Each day this week, I have known even before dragging my sleep-deprived body out of the warm bed, I will be putting my boat into the river above rapids still – this rougher section of the river has not ended yet. Though I know a little of what’s ahead for the day, as things proceed, I continue alive in the awareness of my reliance on the help and the grace of God.
The homestead issue is much closer to being resolved (some relief); the spider bite is healed (thank you, God!); our son is already fully absorbed in college life, but he has still given us some glimpses of himself here and there anyway (joy!); our daughter and granddaughter leave our home today for Portland then early in the AM for New York City (big heart-tugs); The temp. job is over (for now); I’m still getting situated in regard to this ‘school’ thing, trying to balance it with my already existing ‘life’ thing (!); we are in love with our new Chinese friends/daughters (they are ‘stuck’ with us for good); with others helping, the exchange student living with us is registered for school and classes and attending McMinnville high school (a major hurdle behind us). So these are the things that are NOT new now, right? But what about the currents and whirlpools and even rocks they have brought into the stream of things?
For example: with our daughter and granddaughter leaving..
..comes a flow of others to see them before they leave, ALL our children and some friends taking breaks from their ‘other’ lives to be ‘home’ with them for a minute. Home is the hub.
..homestead issues and homework and other pressing or non-pressing ‘things’ end up in the back-eddies and keep getting left behind.
..there are some thrills with this ride as ALL our children and some dear friends are ‘flowing through’ (did I mention this already!?!); people are being hugged and loved and fed and seen and heard. Though things are crazy I know I wouldn’t take my boat out to walk around this rapid for ANYTHING! I know all too soon it will be over. Though I admit I do look forward to more peace and regularity in my life eventually, I wouldn’t change a thing here!
..even while a rock approaches. It looks daunting to even try to keep in touch over the miles and time sufficient to ease the unease of separation from these loved ones.
Meanwhile, school and all the other ‘old’ things and more continue in the midst of all this, to be in the mix of all this, each causing ‘new’ things to continue to come into my life; all making up part of the thrill and the turbulence and the danger of these rapids. All together creating the absolute need to hold firm to the boat and to trust the Master of it.